Difference between True Love, Crush and Infatuation

Key Difference: Love is a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. Crushes are usually considered as an attraction or puppy love that a person may have over another person. These crushes are usually when people are young such as adolescents, coming into the age. Infatuation is when a person gets so swept up in feelings of what they believe is love that they do not see the rationality of the situation.

Humans are fascinated with love. We need love, we crave love, and we’ll do anything for love. There are pages and pages devoted to love throughout history, stories, poems, sonnets, paintings, and so much more. However, sometimes we confuse love with crushes and infatuations. These three are completely different things. Read on to find out how.

According to Dictionary.com, ‘love’ is a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. It is a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. It can also be used to describe sexual passion or desire.  Love is a strong affection and an emotion of personal attachment. Love is defined as a virtue full of human kindness, compassion, and affection; "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another". While, love more often than not is used to denote feelings toward the romantic partner, love in fact is more generic than that.

Loving someone is a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection. It can be used to refer to anyone, any person, or anything. For example: I love you. I love my mom. I love my husband. He loves his girlfriend. I love my dog. They love pizza. She loves vanilla ice-cream. Mary loves the sea. John loves football.  Love can be used to refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from pleasure to interpersonal attraction. It may refer to passionate desire, intimacy of romantic love, sexual love, familial love, platonic love, religious love, and to a concept of love that encompasses all of those feelings.

However, when referring to love between two different people, there are in fact two distinct forms of love:

  • Platonic love: A deep and non-romantic connection or friendship between two individuals. It is love in which the sexual element does not enter. Platonic love can refer to friends, best friend, siblings, parents, children, etc.
  • Romantic love: Considered similar to platonic love, but involves sexual elements. This the type love referred to when talking about love between two partners, such as a boyfriend – girlfriend, husband – wife, boyfriend – boyfriend, girlfriend – girlfriend, etc.

Love or actually the need to be loved is the driving force between all interpersonal relationships that one forms. Love is a psychological need for all humans. We all want to feel loved. Love is in fact a part of our survival instinct. It is a function to keep human beings together so that they may procreate and continue the species. However, this is debatable as to why humans need love, whereas many other species procreate well in the absence of love.

Crushes are usually considered as an attraction or puppy love that a person may have over another person. These crushes are usually when people are young such as adolescents, coming into the age. Crushes are somewhere in the middle of love and infatuation. The relationship may initially start as a crush, but can either develop into love or infatuation. When a person is in this stage, he/she usually fawn or adore the other person. They are vulnerable and can do anything to make the other person realize of their feelings. Crushes happen when a person is attracted to another and believes them to be the epitome of perfection.

Crushes can be one-sided or two-sided. When a person is in this stage, they usually day dream, fantasize or waste ample amounts of time thinking about the other person. Crushes are also not limited to people of the same age. A person usually has a crush on people that they know they have no chance with such as a rockstar, actor/actress, teacher, uncle/aunt, neighbor, friend’s parents, etc. Other names for crushes include: puppy love, simple infatuation, calf love, or kitten love.

Dictionary.com defines ‘infatuation’ as, “foolish or all-absorbing passion or an instance of this.” It is when a person gets so swept up in feelings of what they believe is love that they do not see the rationality of the situation. Infatuation is often caused by sex appeal such as the way a person looks, or the similar interests, etc. Infatuation can also grow into love if given proper time and energy. Infatuation is believed to caused by the increase of adrenalin in the body that causes the person to do irrational things and crave more of it.

It is often associated with destructive things such as obsessive and lust, which are believed to be foundation of the infatuation. If not properly attended; these can often turn into obsession and lust. They can also cause a person to harm themselves or become suicidal if they feel that they are not getting the attention they require in return. Some people believe that infatuation is another name for attraction, as both are caused by similar things. Infatuation can often confuse a person into believing it is love; however it is not. Infatuation causes a person to become selfish, demanding, and addictive; always requiring that extra rush of adrenalin. But, it is short lived and often passes away soon. Infatuation does not always have to be with a person it can also be with objects or materialistic things.

Robert Brown claims that are three types of infatuation which include, “a state of 'being carried away, without insight or proper evaluative judgment, by blind desire', 'evaluation...may well be sound although the craving or love remains unaffected by it' and 'a third type is that of the agent who exhibits bad judgment and misevaluation for reasons such as ignorance or recklessness.” Infatuation is also considered to be only related to physical attraction such as kissing and sex, which then dies down as the chemistry between the two fade away. It isn’t always easy for a person to distinguish infatuation from love, but if they stand back and think about it rationally, they would see that the difference between the two.

 

 True Love

Crush

Infatuation

Definition

A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.

A puppy dog love or attraction towards someone.

Foolish or all-absorbing passion or an instance of this:

Associated with

Selflessness, devoting oneself to another, caring about another, putting others needs in front of you.

Adoration, worshiping affection, intriguing, something different.

Selfishness, obsession, lust.

Sub-Categories

Love can be broken down into wanting to settle with the person, not having to constantly worry, happy and content with the intimacy.

Crush is regarded as a short-time thing that is often felt by adolescents that are just taking a step into the world of attraction and love.

Infatuation is regarded more as a short-lived hormonal activity that causes the adrenalin to shoot up in the system. It is also commonly associated with lust and obsession.

Symptoms

Faithfulness, confidence, more communicative, selflessness.

Fawning, writing poems, doodling, thinking about the person constantly, etc.

Urgency, intensity, drama. A person requires so sort of hook that gives them adrenalin.

Feels like

Security, solidity, calmness, down-to-earth feeling. A person is deeply committed to another, putting their needs first.

The feeling is similar to that of an infatuation. The person feels attracted to the object of affection and adores it.

The feeling of infatuation is similar to that of drugs, addiction, reckless behavior, obsession, insecurity, fear of losing, etc.

Effect

Increase in the ability to make rational decision, especially when considering the other person.

Decrease in the ability to make rational decisions. The person tends to make more irrational decisions, including making a fool of themselves.

Decrease in the ability to make rational decisions, a person tends to make more irrational decisions that they may regret later on in life.

Result

If love tends to survive, the person feels bliss, calmness, security, etc.

It’s a short-term attraction, which can either grow into a deep affection or die down.

Once the temporary interest and attraction fades, the person is left with empty feelings and sadness.

Interdependency

The dependency is based on a partnership.

The person must feel attraction or have something in common.

Must include heavy physical attraction or the infatuation wouldn’t exist.

Time Period

Long time, commonly lasts a good number of years. Platonic love or selfless love can last for ages.

Short-term romance, but it has the chance of growing into something more.

Short-timed romance, that fades away quickly with time. A person tends to become bored of things quickly.

Types

Platonic and romantic.

Puppy love, infactuation.

According to Brown the three types include “being carried away, without insight or proper evaluative judgment, by blind desire, evaluation...may well be sound although the craving or love remains unaffected by it and the agent who exhibits bad judgment and misevaluation for reasons such as ignorance or recklessness.”

Image Courtesy: inspirationaldaily.wordpress.com, business2community.com, selfcreation.com

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Comments

one thing i observed in simple attraction no pain occurs see that person gives u pleasure u know that person can never be yours even one glimpse of that person is enough for u to feel happy that person ignores avoids u no problem in crush same thing is applicable but there is bit pain and jealous bit obession but crush is simple thing infatuation is worse thing it causes great pain interferes in daily activities makes u irritate u want that person and to be with that person u can take any risk u wont realise what the hell u are going to once infatuation becomes weak and fades away that person will became complete repulsive and u will abandon that person its good actually bcoz pain and obession ends

more u avoid and are away from person u are infatuated it is good for ur health try to pass time in useful manner infatuation will fade away

my infatuation has became weak

infatuation is very bad obession causing great pain feelings are one sided luckily i person whom i am infatuated has not done anything wrong only god can heal infatuation time separation once infatuation fades u will find same person whom are infatuated completely repsulive nature is far superior to humans

Hi, can I ask you where you get that Crush, True Love, and Infatuation on that table? Is there any book references that based on that table? Please I really need it to do my final research.. Thanks ^_^

Hi Natasha, the table is based on a variety of sources based on the internet, as well as from primary research. Hope it helped.

Can I ask you what kind of primary research that you're talking about? I really need to know the source about puppy love or infatuation love something like that.. Anyway thanks for replying my comment ^_^

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